Pride

In church on Sunday, the pastor gave examples of 3 different kinds of pride we often fail to overlook: "I'm not like that", "I don't need any help", and "That doesn't apply to me". It was a great sermon and gave me a lot to think about, especially this...

On the one side of our sanctuary is a door that leads to the hallway where the Ladies Room is located. On that door is a big sign that says,"Do not enter! Emergency exit only!" For the last few months, as the service draws to a close, the 2 coffees and 64 ozs. of water I drink with my breakfast seem to kick in full force and I find myself bolting to that door. I know (from watching others) that no alarms go off, no one stops anyone, and that any delay will find me standing in a long line of other female congregants in the same unconfortable position as me if I choose to follow rules and wait in the long line to exit the sanctuary (I sit in the 3rd row usually=have to wait for 20+ rows to exit) and wade through the throngs of people to the Ladies Room.

Yet still, I bolt through the door week after week. My lame justifications? "I HAVE TO GO!" "I've been going to this church for 14+ years!" "I'm an occassional member of the Praise Team!" In short, "That (sign) doesn't apply to ME". Urgh...the ugliness of pride!

So I fought with this all during the sermon last Sunday, knowing that my bladder was about to burst but that a real challenge had been presented to me...do I go through the door and ignore what is clearly stated or just do what I normally do and follow the other "sinners" who ignore the sign? (doesn't it make you feel better when you see other Christians doing something wrong? Makes your sins seem little! HA!)

The service ended, people bolted to the door we're not supposed to open...including me! SINNER! HYPOCRITE! Backslider! I got to the bathroom before the hundred other women who were praying for an open stall...and I said, quite coyly, to the woman who had gone through the same door in front of me,"Do not enter--emergency exit only 'doesn't apply to us', huh?" She "oh, uh..."d for a bit and then shamefully selected a stall as I did also.

Why...? Was I going to have an accident if I didn't wait? No...This has bothered me all week which is why I chose to include it here. I tell my Cov kids all the time, when they ask me to "bend the rules" for them, that I need to be faithful in the little things and that I am a woman of integrity. No, I can't give you a dollar...No, I can't drive you home in my personal car even though it's pouring rain out...No, I can't put money on your books in jail even though "no one will ever know"...Yet, I bust through the "DO NOT ENTER" door because I feel like that "rule" doesn't apply to me.

Yeah, maybe it's a stupid rule, maybe the (probable) men who decided to put it here didn't take the number of women who would need to bolt to a bathroom after a 90 minute Sunday service into consideration...but still, it's there...in glaring RED, reminding me that it's my PRIDE that is leading me to the Ladies Room after the service moreso than my "need to go".

I am issuing myself a personal challenge to work on my pride in this area and NOT bolt to the forbidden door after Sunday services...I will be honest and let you know how I do. The priority of covenants=be faithful in the little things...