I AM with you...

Went to see Godspell last night w/ someone who loves me. I have seen this production at least 10+ times and actually had the joy of being in it 2 years ago(and satisfaction of crossing it off my personal bucket list!). Not only is it fun and speaks the truth of the gospel but I also grew up on the music (thanks, Pop!)

When Mark and I were dating we sat and watched Jesus Christ Superstar together on TV (not even a close second to Godspell but I'm partial) What I recall as we were watching it was a feeling akin to envy or a longing for the characters (disciples) who actually got to physically be with Jesus..."I wish I could have been there" or "If I was right there with Jesus things would be so much clearer". When I was in Godspell, that feeling was magnified and it kind of weirded me out. Here I was WITH JESUS, hearing the gospel, the parables, actually in His presence, learning the truth at His feet! Of course, no...it was, after all, a show and when it closed I went through a withdrawal of sorts.

It struck me this morning that the disciples who were with Jesus for His years of ministry were babies, brand new converts, learning it all for the first time. I'm sure it was indescribable to see the miracles firsthand, to eat with the Savior, to receive a physical touch--heck--to have Him look directly at them and speak to them.
But then He was gone, zapped up to Heaven where He sits waiting to return (maybe zapped is too spacey but you know what I mean). It must have been heartbreaking for them when He left...

But what did He say in the very last line of Matthew? "And lo, I AM WITH YOU ALWAYS, even until the end of the age". Even though I cannot have the physical experience of Jesus in the flesh during my time on this side of life, as I think about it, what I get (and have gotten) is just as awesome. I get His Word, all the truths and parables He taught the disciples which I get to devour over and over and over again...I get the Holy Spirit to nudge and guide and counsel me...I still get to speak to Him whenever I want to in prayer...I get to see miracles and Providential outcomes that I KNOW He has a hand in...I get to serve Him by serving the least of these ("Whatsoever you do for the least of these you have done it unto ME")He IS with me, He IS here...If He had wanted ME to be one of the "Hosanna" folk on Palm Sunday or a weeping woman at the foot of the cross or a wedding guest at the "water into wine" miracle, then I would have been there. But He decided that circa 1973 until (date TBA) was just right for Jennifer McCambridge Kelly/Williams and that how I get to "be" with Him is enough. What a peace and blessing that is...

"Day by day...day by day
Oh, dear Lord, 3 things I pray
To see Thee more clearly
Love Thee more dearly
Follow Thee more nearly day by day..."