Love is kind

The older I get, I more I realize that my strategies to hang on to my youth are quickly being used up. I went out a few weeks ago to dress shop for my niece's wedding (see Jennifer Williams post) and I had a hard time trying to pick something "appropriate". It's bad enough that I'm shaped like a bowling pin, have stretched and shrunk the skin on my butt and the back of my legs through years of weight gain/loss that it just kinda hangs there, have no, um, protrusions on my trunk to attractively fill in the front portion of anything...add to that, I know I'm not 20, 25, 30, or even 35 anymore. I'm pushing 40 and I'm not sure what that is supposed to look like. Am I allowed to wear something above the knee? Do I have to have a little jacket or wrap to cover bare shoulders? Can I get away with bare legs? I know how I feel when I see, like, way older woman trying to look young...and it doesn't look young--it looks ridiculous...and I do NOT want to be one of those women!

I realize sometime soon the long hair may need to go, the wardrobe may need an overhaul, and my makeup a revamp to include more "concealing" products. Granted, I could align some areas of the rest of my life to slow down the aging process but hey--I'm me.

So after trying on 9,000 dresses and feeling discouraged, I finally found 2 that got the "Oooo!" response from me (I put on dresses w/ my back to the dressing room mirror--when I get it all the way on I turn around and if I immediately go, "Oooo!" then it's usually a keeper). One I wore to the wedding last night, and 1 will wear to my sister-in-law's wedding in December. Yay--mission accomplished!

I felt pretty at the wedding but was self-conscience that maybe I was trying too hard to look younger. At the reception, I kept watching all the young girls in their little outfits and bare feet dancing away and was "ok" that I didn't have to try to fit in with that. That WAS me at one time but not now. Still...still...

So it was to my utter delight when Mark led me to the dance floor for a slow dance and said the words I've come to love from him (see I Love When post)..."I look around this room and you are the most beautiful one here"...and I know he means it, flabby thighs, bags under my eyes, crows feet, grey strands in my hair, and all! He knows how I feel about me, my appearance...but he has always been "kind" , as love should be,in his words...not overly obvious, but gently reminding me that to him, I am always his bride, always "the most beautiful one", always the love of his life. I'll take that knowledge over a perky pair of protrusions any day!